Awakening from the illusion of separation


By Stephane Leblanc, Founder and CEO, International Centre for Conscious Leadership

The separation many people feel in our society is a construct of our ego and is not real.

When a baby is in its mother's womb, it feels one with its mother. It does not feel any separation. It feels comfortable and loved and does not have anything to do to have its needs met. What then follows is quite a traumatic process to birth. It is traumatic for the mother as it takes heroic efforts to birth the baby and also traumatic for the baby it has to go through the birth canal, is blinded by all the light as soon as it comes out, feels cold and has to learn to cry to get its needs met. In psychology, the birth is considered to be the primordial wound for all humans as it is the first time that babies realize they realize they are actually not one with the mother. 

As we progress along the journey of our life, we start developing our ego as we learn to talk and walk and get positive recognition from our parents. We eventually learn from society that we are separate from our parents, from other humans and from nature. In our teenage years, we learn that we need to individuate and become independent and that we need to be strong to be able to fulfill all our needs by ourselves. We also learn that showing vulnerability is a sign of weakness.

We also learn that we need to wear masks to protect ourselves from being hurt if we show our true selves to others. We wear a mask at work, in society, with our friends, and even with our loved ones. This allows us to show our best side to everyone we meet so that they will not see our imperfections and will love us. We are afraid that if we actually show others who we really are, maybe they will see that we are imperfect and will not love us as we have learned that others will only love us if we are perfect.

Then something happens to us in our life where we crack. We encounter a very challenging event that forces us to face our humanity and our imperfections. It could be a divorce, a serious health issue, the death of a loved one, a job loss or any other event of significant importance. Such event often brings us on our knees and forces us to face the fact that we are not a superhero and that just like everyone else, we have flaws, even if we have worked very hard to camouflage them.

Often, as we go through these traumatic events and we face a lot of doubts, we open our heart to others as we need to be held by some loving souls so we can survive these traumas and heal the wounds. As we recover from the events, we start to realize that we have become different as we now have a crack in us and through this crack, the light of the world can come into us and our own light can shine onto the world.

We have learned to embrace our imperfections as an integral part of our humanity and often realize learn that this is what makes us so perfect. As we have overcome a lot of suffering, we gain compassion for ourselves and for others and we get a better appreciation for the fact that everyone goes through some suffering, no matter what they are showing on social media, and we start to appreciate people for who they really are and we judge them less.

These traumatic events are the process that life uses to help us to let go of the illusion of separation as the suffering also helps us to overcome some of the fears and limiting beliefs of our ego and to open our hearts to others which helps us to connect with them.

As we continue with our transformation process, we expand our consciousness and we start to realize that we are connected energetically to all other humans and all of nature and that we are all different representations of the same universal consciousness. We learn that separation is an illusion. We also realize that the separation we create from others to protect us is, in fact, one of the greatest sources of our suffering and that this disconnection from ourselves, others and nature is the root of all the major problems in society.

We learn to embrace the crack that we have in us and to embrace the light in us, in others and in all of the universe.

We embrace unity consciousness.